Tim Burton has turned us all into monsters. He fought deliberately hard to scribble his gothic signature onto our lump-less landscape of animated penguins. Now we’re all blood-thirsty for skulls and German necrophilia. We want BATS and we want to cloak ourselves in mourning dress to visit Tesco so we can buy vegetables and cigarettes and cans of petrol. We’re not asking for much.

Do you know anything about Tim Burton’s early life? You DO know he doesn’t just pop-up every Halloween with a re-run of The Corpse Bride, right? Because like Christ, this man has suffered on the celluloid cross for us.

Drawing cute puppy dogs for Disney was a nightmare for Tim - animating hideous monsters a dream. And thank god he pursued the latter. Positivity never worked for Burton. Desperate losses provoked him toward success. It was only when he LOST his scholarship that he produced his first pencil drawn cartoon Stalk of the Celery Monster (1979). The film stirred the attentions of Disney who stupidly offered Burton a job. Burton was set to work drawing pointlessly cute dogs rather than lurid beasts. The eccentric structure of his revolutionary lead began wasting away.